“You need to wake up amongst the scum you reside in”

When my latest Grindr suitor denounced the Hitlers of history, he sounded just like one of them.

Him: Hello fellow American

What’s up?

Me: Hey man. Can I see your face?

[He sends me a picture of himself at a swanky event with three glasses of white wine and one glass of rose wine on the table in front of him.)

Him: What brings you to this disobedient colony?

Me: How cute are you? I’m just hanging out. Are you really American?

Him: My ancestors were Italians

So there you have it

Me: Cool. And you’re in Belgrade?

On holiday?

Him: I’m on government business

And you?

Me: I’m a writer soaking up inspiration.

Him: You found the right place — disinspiration

If there’s such a word

Me: What do you mean by it?

Him: Disobedient people, poor and envious

Hard to control them yet easy by force

Me: I have a different impression of Serbs. In general, I like them.

But I’m more inspired by the city than the people. I’m not really a people person. Writers usually aren’t.

Him: Serbs are responsible for an ethnic cleansing unseen since WW2. I really don’t see what it is to like in them.

They are disobedient to our political goals

Me: Look, if I were to hold historic ethnic cleansing against people, I’d hate Americans and Argentines and South Africans. I’ve lived in all three places. It’s been a fact of life and my people (blacks) have suffered greatly because of it. So I do not need a lecture on it from you. Ok?

Him: And a gateway for Russia in the Balkans

Because you need to wake up amidst the scum you reside in

Me: So you are here to preach and pontificate? Not interested. We’re done.

Him: Such a shame. Bye.

Brother Son Husband Friend Loner Minimalist World Traveler. Author of “Is It True What They Say About Black Men?” and “Storms in Africa” https://rb.gy/3mthoj