5 Words and Phrases Straight People Should Stop Using

It’s OK to say “gay” — as long as you’re not in Florida — but let’s just banish these offenders from polite conversation.

Jeremy Helligar
5 min readMay 24, 2023
Photo: depositphotos.com

I’m old enough to remember when “queer” was a dirty word, scarlet letters gay people were expected to wear with shame. “He’s queer,” the old church lady might say, whispering “queer,” because it was just too awful to say out loud in polite Christian company.

It wasn’t until the great reclamation of the word commenced — around the time I came out in the early ’90s — that “queer” started to reemerge as an acceptable designation: “We’re here! We’re queer! Get used to it!”

Today, many of us wear it with pride. It’s become even more fashionable than “gay” (and for some Gen Z-ers, preferable to “gay”), perhaps partly because it’s not just about sexual orientation. You can call yourself “queer” without really committing to a label or fussing over pronouns. It encompasses sexual fluidity, politics, pop culture, and fashion. A guy who generally identifies as straight might actually call himself “queer” because he likes to wear makeup and frocks, and he’d rather watch RuPaul’s Drag Race than football.

My point: Language evolves. But I can’t imagine a day when it will be OK to refer to an…

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Jeremy Helligar
Jeremy Helligar

Written by Jeremy Helligar

Brother Son Husband Friend Loner Minimalist World Traveler. Author of “Is It True What They Say About Black Men?” and “Storms in Africa” https://rb.gy/3mthoj

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